It's a long, long road...

Okay, here's the story. A month or so ago (my mind is truly mush), my second son, who is in 8th grade at our Jr. High, was complaining almost daily of belly aches when he came home. He would walk in the door ornery and scowling and not feeling good. I figured it was school lunch, which frequently gives the poor kid heartburn, but one day my amazing boy (who is deeply spiritual) came in the room and sat down and told me that he had figured out why he felt ill every day. The boys at the back of the bus cuss constantly and tell dirty jokes. I know this is within the realm of normal for jr. high boys, and (of course) I don't like it, but I was very surprised that DS connected his feeling ill with his spirit being offended. I was so glad HE had figured it out!

Anyway, I asked him what he thought we should do about that-- should I call and complain to someone? Should I drive him every day? I also recommended that he say something to them. He said he had, and that had made it worse for a while. He is very small for his age, and not a tough kid-- he's as far from a jock as you can get without being a total nerd. So he doesn't have much "power" with the other boys his age, especially on the bus. After a day or two of thinking it over, he told me he had decided to ask his one friend that he sits by every day to move with him to the front of the bus.

The friend refused. This boy is a big, tough boy, and he likes being "cool" and sitting at the back of the bus. Ain't no one gonna push him out. So my DS moved. Alone. He sits alone every day on the way home from school, near the front of the bus.

The first day after he moved, he came in the house smiling and hugged me and said how much better he felt. I can't even tell you how proud I am of this boy. He is taking a stand, even if it's quietly. He does ride back there in the mornings with his friend, because the boys are pretty quiet and mellow that early. But every afternoon, he just sits at the front. He knows they probably think he's a geek.

Remarkable for a 13 year old boy!

In the inevitable sibling comparison, it's interesting to realize his 9th grade brother never had a problem like this. For one thing he has a big group of friends that all sit together and make their own noise, and, though he is also spiritual, maybe he's not as highly attuned to that kind of thing. He's been somewhat desensitized by his involvement in sports and such. He doesn't use that language, but he can let it roll off his back more easily than his brother. Interesting how different their experiences have been.