Insights....please!

[5ft Diva]

I know that many of you have had periods in your life where something unexpected has occurred and you've had to figure out how to rearrange your life so that the needful things get accomplished and I know that doing this is easier said than done.

Have any of you been able to do this? If so, how did you go about it and how long did it take before you felt like you were standing on two legs again? Was there a skill that you had to develop before you could "see the forest for the trees"?

I'm finding that not only do I need perspective, but also perception - the ability to recognize what needs to be done FIRST - in regards to the WHOLE picture.

[bookworm]

Sorry this isn't helpful, but I look forward to hearing the responses from our other BnS-ers. I haven't felt like I was "standing on two legs" for years. Life just seems to get crazier and crazier and it's harder and harder to do everything I need/want to do. I feel like I live in a snow globe. Just as the things begin to settle down around me, it is shaken again. I'm perpetually in a flurry of activity and obligation and responsibility and it's really getting difficult to hold on. There are certain aspects that are out of my hands that make it even harder than it might be otherwise, but being out of my control, I can't change them. At least not that I know of... and there are other things I can control that take time to adjust and time is not a luxury I have right now.

Anyway, good topic, I hope you get some helpful responses!!!

[Erudite]

Originally Posted by 5ft Diva

Have any of you been able to do this? If so, how did you go about it and how long did it take before you felt like you were standing on two legs again? Was there a skill that you had to develop before you could "see the forest for the trees"?

I'm finding that not only do I need perspective, but also perception - the ability to recognize what needs to be done FIRST - in regards to the WHOLE picture.

Hmmm...well, speaking from the experience of having my health out of whack for quite some time, the feeling of having 2 feet on the ground took awhile to find. Finding it though was a matter of carefully 1) prioritizing what I chose to spend my energy on and then 2) finding smaller ways to do a better job of what still had to be done. I also recognized that I'd been preparing for what had come into my life before, without realizing what I'd been preparing for. 3) Falling back on those inspired plans made life a bit easier for me. So, details for each of the 3 above:

1) As you know, my priorities had to change to just 3 things: shower and dress everyday, read my scriptures, be nice to my children. If those 3 things were done, I took the time to pat myself on the back because that was as much as I really needed to accomplish in a day. Those 3 were the only things I spent actual energy on for a long time, and there were so many days even they couldn't get done. So I had to do number 2.

2) Reducing even what I had prioritized. I had to shower every day, but found that I couldn't wear many of my clothes because I'd put on weight and so I was in my jammies much of the day. To accomplish "shower and dress" I shopped online for some big comfy shirts and elastic waist pants to just be comfortable. I had my hair cut to a wash and go style (for awhile I couldn't lift my arms above my head to style my hair) and I only put on foundation and mascara. So by doing a bit of thinking, I reduced even the requirement to shower and dress (which for me includes hair and make-up).

I reduced my scripture study by usually just reading instead of studying and I reduced "be nice to kids" to reading books with the kids in a comfy chair. I also guided house cleaning and meal preparation from my comfy chair and tried to be complimentary about their efforts.

3) About 6 months before I got so sick, I was impressed to really put in order my zone cleaning plans that my children are supposed to do to help keep the house clean. That one thing made a HUGE difference, because my kids and I had a solid plan to follow to keep up with most of the house.

So...first, 5D, you KNOW you've been inspired to do some things in preparation for this time. Lean on that. Second, prioritize to the very most essential and then, third, figure out what the bare minimum is for doing those. If you'll do that, you'll find that time and energy will open up in surprising ways and you'll find that you can often do the maximum of your priority list or even a few things not on that list. But in all, pat yourself on the back for doing the most important things first and let everything else rest on the atonement.

That was my last survival strategy. I felt bad for all the things I could no longer do and I prayed OFTEN that the atonement would make up for my lack during the time I was sick. It can; it did; it will.

Hang in there my friend...if your feet aren't on the ground, you're being carried.

[Mamallama]

ER I am so in awe of you. I can't find the right words to express what I'd like to say. You truly are a wise and amazing woman. Your priorities are so perfect---and I think you adjusted your goals so well to adapt to your circumstances. I am teary eyed just imagining what a difficult trial this all must have been for you and continues to be.

What great priorities to set. Funny how I can get so caught up in doing and worrying about so many "other" things, that the simple most important things sometimes are taken for granted, and in the rush of doing "too much" sometimes those simple most important elements of living are not given the credit and dedication they deserve....

Thank you so much for the profound reminder of what is most important. Staying close to the Lord--and staying close to our family---to just be nice.

Thank you ER for sharing this experience. I am so deeply touched. You're in my thoughts and prayers.
Love,
Mamallama

[Erudite]

Thanks. I wouldn't wish the method I learned these things on anyone, but they really do help when the bad days come along. They still do and I revert back to the 3 priorities when they come. For me, now, tomorrow will always be better. There's no recovery time for my illness, so I can usually count on feeling good the day after.

[natickgirl]

Nothing deep here (E, again, I think you're amazing & wise). I go into survival mode when unexpected things occur. I focus on the basics: get kids up, fed, to school, laundry done, figure out what's for dinner, etc.

Pray + Ponder + Prioritize = Perspective.

It never ceases to amaze me how many things I think are "absolutely necessary" really aren't. They tend to fall by the wayside during crisis times, and I realize how cluttered I let my life get sometimes.

[5ft Diva]

Cluttered is a great descriptive word. I'll keep that in mind. Thanks for your thoughts, ladies. It's been very helpful.