What's For Dinner?

[Dia Minha]

I'm really struggling with food right now. Breakfast and lunch are manageable, because I can get away with eating what I want when I want to and not have to meet the demands of five children and a husband. Then dinner comes and I just want to scream. I hate fixing dinner. I hate, that there is not one thing that I want to eat for dinner that all my children and husband will also eat. I hate having to fix dinner at a certain time, because that is when everyone else is hungry. I hate deciding what is for dinner. I wouldn't care what was being served if I didn't have to make it. Because if it wasn't something that fit into my food plan, then I would fix me something else. All my other meals during the day are more like snacks. However, I feel like dinner needs to be a complete meal. But again, that is not how I eat. I feel like I have to do it that way for my family.

I need help. I think it would help if I had some idea of how other mothers, wives, homemakers, got dinner on the table. So how do you do dinner? How do you decide what is for dinner? What time do you eat dinner? Why did you choose that dinner time? What are some things that you have done over the years to make dinner easier? Any little thing will help here ladies. So, even if it sounds unimportant I want to hear it.

There are not many things in this life that I can say that I hate. In fact, I can't think of anything I hate right now except dinner. Please help.

[Dia Minha]

Oh, and some dinner ideas would be great. I think some new ideas on what to serve for dinner would also be very helpful.

[missypoohsticks]

Dia,
At my house, we eat dinner between 5 and 6. I decided on that time because it is early enough so that I'm not full when I go to bed and late enough that no one is hungry before they go to bed.
I cook what my husband and I like. My kids do occasionally get a choice, but I feel like they need to be able to try many different things. As a result, my kids are adventurous eaters and will try most anything.
Some of our favorite meals are: Chicken Mole, Cheesy White Chili with Cauliflower, Chicken Enchiladas, Tacos, Fajitas, Cabbage Rolls, Teriyaki Chicken, Meat Gravy over Rice, and I'm sure there are others that I can't think of.

[Dia Minha]

Hey Missy, is the Teriyaki Chicken the recipe you used for the Teriyaki rice bowls at the Enrichment night we had in the Canyon last year? That was so yummy. Would you mind sharing the recipe?

[bookworm]

Dia, it sounds like your kitchen needs to be reigned in!! I know the feeling. Here is what I do- take it or leave it .
The kitchen is closed to snacking at 4:00. If you didn't get a snack and you're starving, you might get a glass of milk, but no more snacking. I'm still working on the eating at the same time thing, but we're getting there, here's my ideal evening: At 5:00 I declare it "reading time!" and the kids are all supposed to do their quiet reading for a half hour or so while I put dinner together-- I do much better in a quiet house. I wish I had thought of this years ago. Then dinner is usually around 5:45-6:00 ish.

As for what they eat- I make what I like. I'm very blessed with a husband who will eat nearly anything I make-- there are a few meals he doesn't care for, but most everything I make is fine. So I make a menu each month and try to stick to it. Lately money has been tight, so I'm making a lot of throw-together food-storage type meals. Tonight we had chicken with rice cooked together with a saucy gravy on top made from cream of chicken soup, evaporated milk and spices. It was pretty good, I threw in some broccoli, too, and everyone ate at least a little.

We've had years of problems with people complaining about what is being served, and we're still working on it. Some nights-- especially if I worked hard on the meal, or we ate a little late-- I don't let the kids have a bedtime snack, because they shouldn't need it if they ate their dinner. Some nights, when I know I'm making something my daughter hates, after she eats a little, I will let her get a piece of bread with pb on it or something, just so she isn't going hungry. I know different parents do it differently, but this helps us all feel good. And I do require everyone to try what's cooked.

Anyway, I would recommend you take DH's tastes into consideration, and let the kids complain away if they don't like it. Just a thought... I've grown weary of all the whining, and I'm beginning to think we'll start having a consequence for it, but I'm not sure... I keep thinking, if I can get through this, one day it'll be their wife/husband's problem, not mine... lol...

And hopefully my boys will all learn to eat what they're served on their missions...

[Meticulous madness]

This is a good topic, Dia! I like hearing what others do and how they prepare!

I also vouch for the meal planning thing (though I typically only do one week at a time). I go through cycles. Some times I'm really good, and some times I get thrown off. But, I do find that it's cheaper to make (and keep) a food plan, and it's easier - because if there's a plan in force, I'm less inclined to say "we have NOTHING to eat in this house - let's eat out." I also try to coordinate my meals with the coupon deals and ads for the week (trying to couple them with things already on hand). So, that's another way to save and to utilize my resources, by rotating the "case-lot" stuff.

I also try to PLAN in a night here and there where we eat out (typically nights that I work, or if I'm in Salt Lake for a long time and we get home late). It keeps us all sane to be able to order our OWN THING once in a while, and have somebody else make it for us

We eat about 6:30, when DH gets home. It's later than I'd like to do it, but eating together is important to me so I try to do a later breakfast and lunch for the kids and I.

I like the idea of the kids having quiet reading time while mom cooks. Right now they do pretty good playing during that time on their own, but many nights I have little shadows. Some times they "help" and I think that's fun, too. When they get older, I think I'll have a night here and there, where they're in charge of the side dishes and desserts, or whatnot. I think it makes kids more inclined to eat, if they help with the preparation.

Like the other ladies, I mostly choose foods that DH and I like and let the kids try it all, without being overly insistent that they eat it. I refuse to be a short-order cook, but I do think that some of our tastes are more "adult" - so I also try to have a few fruits/veggies, bread, string cheese and other convenience items on hand that they can eat, once they've tried the foods and know they don't want them.

I think it's hard to enjoy cooking when you're conscientious about your diet and nobody else is. I would think it takes a lot more determination and planning. I know there are a lot of WW variations you can make, of the same food - but it's probably challenging to do two sets.

I'll have to list my mom's favorite WW recipes. Usually she only likes the recipes that DON'T seem like WW foods (and ones that non-dieting people like). Good luck with the conscientious part! I will get there one day.

Our family likes fattening comfort foods - like lasagna, fajitas, enchiladas, chicken a'la king, any type of pasta with cheese bread, crockpot chicken, roast with potatoes and carrots, ribs, crab legs, hamburgers, turkey, anything fondue or BBQ'd/smoked. I love to experiment with new recipes. I find that trying something new and adventurous provides "sparks" and keeps the love alive, in my relationship with my kitchen. Just so long as those sparks don't set the kitchen on fire!

[Meticulous madness]

I'm sorry to be so wordy...but...

I kind of just skimmed over my favorite dinner item - the crockpot.

You asked what we've used over the years to make things easier - and the crockpot is an absolute necessity at our house! I'd be lost without it.

Do you use one? The reason I think it would be great for you is that you could do your dinner preparations during the early afternoon or morning and then not think about it again (since the most chaotic part of the day around anybody's house seems to be right before dinner).

Then you quickly whip up a few healthy side dishes about 5 or 10 minutes before you plan to eat (or prepare a quick kosher snack or two for yourself) and everybody is happy. Most meals turn out really nice and hot like you've slaved over them all day - without you really having to do much, or think about it.


ETA - I just remembered that you were talking in another thread about crockpot beans. So, it sounds like you are already using a crockpot.

[5ft Diva]

I'm w/ you, Dia. I dread dinner time. Especially when I don't have a plan!!!!! Here's what I've done to combat that problem. The kitchen is one of our zones so I have made meal planning as one of the chores for the kids. I have found that I really don't mind cooking if I know what to cook. I have felt frustrated cooking things that I think the family would like and they end up hating especially because I enjoy cooking from scratch and that takes some time and effort. The nice thing about this is that a different person picks the meals every two weeks so we have a good variety. The kids have had fun going through my cookbooks and picking different things. I'm pretty amazed at what they want to try. Then....if they don't like it, they can't blame me. But we haven't tried anything yet that we don't like.

As far as meals go, my standards are:
Spaghetti
Baked potatoes
Fried Rice (using left over ham)
Hamburger Helper - I only use this one if I HAVE to
Tacos
Taco Soup
Sloppy Joes
We just tried Ramona's Chicken Taco Pie out of the Ward cookbook that is going to become a standard
Chicken Nuggets
Hamburgers/hot dogs (only on the grill)
Chicken Patty Sandwiches
Apple Puff Pancakes
Cowboy Casserole
Crockpot Lasagna
BLT's
Fish Fillets
Stroganoff
Frozen Burritos w/ Enichilada sauce (you gave me this idea)
French Toast
Ham
grilled cheese sandwiches (this is BS's standby if I don't step up and he's hungry enough to cook for our army)

This list has become monotonous for me. I really like trying new things. If I could, I'd have something different for every night of the year.

Meals my family likes that I don't cook often:
Hawaiian Haystacks
Chicken Divan
Pan Burrito - VERY TASTY
Shrimp Scampi
Ravioli Soup
Bow Tie Chicken Pasta (also in the Ward cookbook)
Chicken Noodle Soup
Potato Soup
Ribs
Roast

[5ft Diva]

Oh, as far as when... We regularly eat sometime after 6:00 and on many nights 7:00. What can I say, I drag my feet when it comes to cooking because I hate (I mean I LOVE!) cleaning my kitchen so I can have enough work space.

Things I've done in the past to make dinner easier is buy cheese by the bulk and shred it (I have a salad shooter) and then bag it and freeze it. I've also done that w/ ground beef (not shredding it - cooking/bagging/freezing) and it's amazing just how much time that saves! A short cut that Smed taught me that I really like is to just throw your chicken in the crockpot sometime after lunch on low (three hours on high) so you're chicken is ready to go by dinner time; that way you at least have something to work w/ even if you don't have any plans.

The thing that I did that helped me the most is budget in a couple of eating out nights for those days when I just don't want to cook or absolutely don't have time to cook. This is where we'll get those Jr. Bacon Cheeseburgers at Wendy's or $5 pizzas from LC. It's cheap, yet satisfying. (At least for us.) I also can't believe the difference it's made to go to paper plates while we've been working on the basement.

Also, and I don't know if this is helpful, if dinner isn't happening as quickly as my kids want it to, they come to me and ask me what I want them to make. It doesn't happen very often but at least they're willing. The meals they're capable of doing are: soup, mac-n-cheese (yuck!), ramen, spaghetti, eggs, pancakes, or anything from the freezer. It works!

[5ft Diva]

THIS IS A GREAT TOPIC, DIA!!!!!

[bookworm]

I agree with Diva, great topic, Dia.

[Dia Minha]

I'm glad everyone is enjoying this topic. I really appreciate the help. Now that I've heard from some of you, (well, I guess I already knew this, I just didn't want to admit it) I've realized that I need to plan ahead. For some reason this has never really worked for me. I just don't seem to be able to wrap my head around the idea that I can plan my meals several days in advance. How am I going to know what I want to eat on Sunday?

I know it would help to plan meals that I look forward to eating. If I'm looking forward to eating something, then usually I don't want snack before hand and it would be easier to get it on the table. So I think my first step is to come up with a list of foods that I would love to eat. I have done this in the past, by thinking about what I would choose to eat if I were eating out. Usually I can copy a recipe and make it healthier. I love the idea of picking one or even two nights and plan on eating out those nights. I have done this in the past and I always seemed to get more done those days. Almost like knowing that I don't have to worry about making dinner gives me more time and energy to focus on something else. And there are several places where I know how to order enough food for my family for less then it would take me to make it. It isn't always healthier, but once a week wouldn't do too much damage.

I can see how for me having a helper in the kitchen would be beneficial. I love spending time with my kids and they love to cook. If I had them in the kitchen with me, it would be more enjoyable and they could do a lot of the prep work that would save me time and energy. And did I mention that they love to do it. I don't know why I haven't worked that into my chore schedule. Thanks for the idea Diva.

I do really appreciate all the comments. I didn't mention everybody by name, but all of you have said something that has helped. Keep the ideas coming please.

[runamyrun]

Like others have said, sometimes I am great at planning my meals and sometimes I am not. My mother-in-law and sister-in-law write down on their monthly calendar what they are planning on eating each night. I plan differently because some nights I might want to eat chicken and maybe the next night it wouldn't sound as good. I sit down and plan 10 dinners (when we add in eating leftovers, eating out, or warming up canned soup it lasts 2 weeks for us). I try to have a variety of food (some have beef, some chicken, some no meat, etc). One thing I have been doing recently is to ask my family what is one thing they would like to eat for dinner. Then I put it on the menu. That way I know that at least one night in the next two weeks, each person in my family will be happy with what we are eating. I do not plan a specific meal for a specific day. So, in the morning, I look at my list of dinners and decide which one sounds good for that day. I like to be flexible. And like others have said, my family has to eat a little bit of what I made, and if they don't like it they can make a pb sandwich.

[bookworm]

Originally Posted by runamyrun

So, in the morning, I look at my list of dinners and decide which one sounds good for that day. I like to be flexible.

I know a few people who do it this way-- it sounds like a good idea for people who don't want to plan it out too rigidly.

We frequently swap one night for another if I end up too busy to make what was on the menu (or if I forget to thaw something out)...

[Dia Minha]

Amy I love that idea. It sounds like something that would really work for me. My only concern being that I use a lot of fresh fruits and veggies. How do you make sure you have things like that on hand, without letting them spoil before they get used?

[runamyrun]

We love to use lots of fresh fruits and veggies too. Some of my fruits and veggies will last in the fridge for that long. For the ones that don't, I make sure to cook those meals sooner.

[Dia Minha]

I'm going to have to try it. Usually when I try to plan more than a week ahead, I end up throwing away a lot of spoiled, fresh, foods. So maybe I'll shoot for four days. If I start out with four days and plan on having one throw together meal and eat out once and once at my mom's (we are always in Salt Lake at dinner time on Wednesdays so we eat at my mom's), then that would cover a week. I feel like I could do that. Thanks ladies.

[bookworm]

I was also thinking that if you can remember to check your menu the day before, you can always pick up whatever fresh veg you need for the day. I buy two weeks at a time, and some veg lasts that long and some doesn't. I usually have to stop in at the store after the first week for milk anyway, so sometimes I pick up fruit or veggies that we need for the second week.

[Dia Minha]

Ok, so last night I went to my WW meeting. I couldn't even get through Weigh in without crying. I have not been in a good place when it comes to food for a while. Maybe never. So I stayed after to talk to my WW leader and lo and behold we found a problem. It is by no means my biggest problem, but it will probably give me the most help and its planning ahead. I very seldom plan what I'm going to eat. I have always known I would do better if I did, but have never spent the time to wrap my head around it. So my challenge this week is to plan what I'm going to eat the entire day first thing in the morning.

So, why am I putting this here on this thread. Not to change to subject. I'm not wanting anyone to reply on this post. I just wanted to say thank you. Reading this thread prepared me for knowing what it was that I needed to work on and has given me some tools to do it. So keep the ideas coming.

I'm starting out slow. I'm going to figure out what I'm going to eat for dinner in the morning. I will choose what we are going to eat by what fresh fruits and veggies I have and and what needs to be eaten first. I will start creating a list of meals that I can look forward to eating, so that I am not tempted to ruin my dinner meal by doing too much snacking. I will plan a small, low point, treat at the end of the day, so that I will make sure to have enough points to enjoy it.

Thanks again ladies. You are all so awesome.

[natickgirl]

Dia, I just want to say I think you're doing a great job. I struggle with different issues, but just seeing how you work through things, ask advice, and share honestly has helped me. I admire your courage & determination.

I, too, need to plan ahead. For some reason, I am averse to planning anything ahead of time. I think it's my fear of commitment...if there is a plan, then there is an expectation that can potentially go unmet. Throw in my lack of organizational skills, and you get haphazard meals put on the table anywhere from 5:30 to 7:30 each night. (Not trying to hijack the thread, just processing in public again.)