Losing Weight vs. Getting Healthy

[Stargazer]

A couple of years ago my 8 year old (now ten) started making comments that indicated to me that she thought she was fat :-\ (I think that idea was probably given to her by a tiny little stick of a "friend" Anyhow, it really concerned me because 1 - she's so young I hate to have her even thinking about this topic and 2 - she's a thin, athletic, active girl. She's taller and bigger (not fatter) than most girls her age and so I can see how that thought might come to her. I talked to a friend who is a dietician about my concerns. I know that it's becoming more and more common for young girls to get obsessed about their size. So, to come to the real point of this post - many of us have young children and they hear us constantly talking about being fat, losing weight, cutting calories, etc. My dietician friend said that it is very important for us not to talk like that around our children, but to talk in terms of becoming healthy. In applying that I have talked to my daughter about losing weight so that I feel better, so that I don't develop health problems related to being overweight, etc. I found this to be really valuable advice and have truly tried to put it to use when I'm around children - anyone's children. I thought it was good advice to share.

[5ft Diva]

Unfortunately, it's not only girls who are worried about their weight. My oldest son came home the other day asking me if I noticed that he put on some weight. I told him that I did. He then said, "Do you think I'm fat?" I'm like, "Honey, you're the last person in the world to be worrying about being fat, you want to gain all the weight you can!" Anyway, I explained to him that ever since he was a baby he's always put on extra weight right before he was about to grow. I told him to expect to grow an inch or two here in a little bit. He seemed excited about that but then he talked a little bit more about looking fat again. It was a weird conversation to be having and I think he was doing it for attention but I'd rather he get attention some other way than dwelling on his weight. I need to remember the healthy approach. I'm sure he'll have daughters one day, as I can't seem to manage that, and he'll need to have that perspective as well.

[LostnFound]

My children also worry so much about their body image. Especially my older boys. One boy thinks he is to short. Another thinks he is to fat. My poor oldest son is getting acne and is constantly worried about that. I feel so bad for the youth and the pressure to be perfect. I am constantly telling them how wonderful they are and how grateful they should be for their bodies but it is so hard to compete with peers and society.

[5ft Diva]

Keep it up LostnFound. You're kids are so lucky to have you as a mom.

[Erudite]

Originally Posted by Stargazer

My dietician friend said that it is very important for us not to talk like that around our children, but to talk in terms of becoming healthy. In applying that I have talked to my daughter about losing weight so that I feel better, so that I don't develop health problems related to being overweight, etc.

I have to share something my brother has shared that has somewhat changed my thinking about "becoming" healthy. He said that we need to develop a mental image of what "healthy" is and begin to live it. We need to think of ourselves as "healthy people". This helps us to make good choices and avoid the bad ones, because they are no longer a part of who we are. His mental image of healthy includes "Healthy people eat healthy foods", "Healthy people exercise". While his thoughts also include losing weight, what is more important to him is health, rather than image, due to the ideas that Stargazer brought up. Many a day it's helped me get back on the treadmill...because healthy people exercise and I'm a healthy person. When our image of ourselves is like that, our choices are better and more consistent.

[5ft Diva]

Yeah, I always try to do that. I'm glad that I can be an inspiration to all of those unhealthy people out there in my community. I'm sure that one day they will thank me for my generous showmanship in how to be healthy and the humility displayed by me in rendering my expertise to all the little people out there. Thank you one and all, and.....you are welcome. ;D