Needing Challenge Partner or Group

[5ft Diva]

If you guys want to have some privacy, but still like the option of using this forum, BS can make this private for only you and those who are involved in this group. We have several different private groups on BnS and it works great.

[Dia Minha]

I was thinking about that this morning Diva. How do you gals feel about that? It would be easier to carry on conversations on the forum than in emails. We wouldn't have to have a set time to call or meet. We would have access to support and venting 24 hours a day.

[runamyrun]

I want to join! I need to think about what my goals are, though. While I was pregnant, I got in the habit of eating too much and eating treats too often. I gained more than I wanted to and now I need to work it off. I know that I want to eat less sugar, but I don't want to give it up entirely. I also want to cut down on the quantity of food I have been eating. And probably next week I would like to start exercising.

[Meticulous madness]

Originally Posted by runamyrun

I want to join! I need to think about what my goals are, though. While I was pregnant, I got in the habit of eating too much and eating treats too often. I gained more than I wanted to and now I need to work it off. I know that I want to eat less sugar, but I don't want to give it up entirely. I also want to cut down on the quantity of food I have been eating. And probably next week I would like to start exercising.

Sweet RAR! Great to have you aboard! I'm really excited about this after having a day to think about it. I'm ready to go.

I think we will have a blast, we'll have some great support - and we'll be doing some really worth-while things for ourselves.

My vote is to do it privately. I think I'd be more open and honest that way.
Thanks for mentioning it, Diva! I'll leave it up to you other gals, but just wanted to put in my two cents.

[Dia Minha]

Awesome. I'll talk to Big Sissy tonight and hopefully he can get it up and running for us. What do we want to call it. How about "Abstinence Challenge"? He he he. I actually got that because of you M&M. If you guys aren't happy with that you better let me know soon. Or we could go with "Abstinence Support Group"? Oh man I'm bad at things like this. Give me some help here ladies.

[Meticulous madness]

I think I like the Abstinence Support Group better. Just because acronyms sound best with 3 letters or more.

Maybe we could come up with a name where the acronym spells a word (and the word would be applicable to what it is we're doing). So, maybe we think of the word, and we work backwards? What's a good word for what we're doing?

Sweat. Grow. Strive. Push.

I dunno. Maybe that's just thinking too much.

[Dia Minha]

That makes sense M&M, I'll think about it and get back to you. LnF and RAR you keep thinking too. I would like to get us a private forum as soon as possible and in order to do that I have to be able to give BigS a name.

[Dia Minha]

Another thing, I need to know everybody that wants to participate so the BigS can add you to the access list. Is there anyone else who has been wanting to quit eating or drinking or partaking of any substance who would like to join the group for support and understanding? I really want it up and running before Monday if that is possible for BigS. So, please let me know as soon as you can.

[Mamallama]

What about ACT : Abstinence Challenge Training?

I can't go “Cold Turkey” on my abstinence from vices, but I may need to train myself thru babysteps to do so…..thus abstinence challenge training......just a thought....whatever you all want to call it is fine!

Abstinence from anything unhealthy in what we do, say or intake into our body is that the boundaries? I like the idea too of replacing the unhealthy with something healthy. Are you planning to do this for a set time period? I seem to work best with a set time frame to work on something. I’d like to join in----but will share my goals when we go into private mode.....if you'll have me

[5ft Diva]

ML, I like your thinking. If you were to adopt this approach it would be helpful to me. As you all know I'm trying to eat smaller and healthier meals more frequently. I'm not abstaining from unhealthy food, but rather unhealthy eating habits. I don't know if this counts as I'm not going cold turkey. Do you feel that cold turkey quitters need to stick w/ cold turkey quitters or would this work?

[Dia Minha]

Diva, I think it would work. We might find that those that are doing one thing kind of part off from the other, but that we will all help each other in the end.

Mama, I really like ACT. BigS can get us up and running by Monday. I'll give everyone until Saturday night to either yeah or neah on ACT and to officially join. I will start a new thread for you to confirm your interest. This way I won't loose anyone in the process.

I have set up my own time period. I think the time period could be personalized. As in everyone can decide for themselves their own timeline. I can offer a guide by reposting my goal once we are up and going. I will include my plan for replacing the bad with the good.

For those of you breaking addictions The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints Family Services puts out a program called "Addiction Recovery Program". You can learn more about it and download it online here: [Only registered and activated users can see links. ] or purchase it at the distrubution center. If any of you would like a copy I can pick it up for you the next time I go into Salt Lake. I have been reading and studying it for a while now. It is an amazing "Giude to Addiction Recovery and Healing" and has been both a great help and comfort to me.

[Big_Sissy]

I think I'd like to join up with this, but I'm a little tentative due to the nature of my addiction, and that I don't believe it's common knowledge, and to be quite frank it is embarrassing to me. And No, it's not porn

I think I'll discuss this with Diva and see what she thinks.

I'm also not sure it fits either.. maybe I should be looking for a more specialized group, and this is just the push I needed to make that step.

[5ft Diva]

Do what you are comfortable doing, BS. We all love you here so if you choose not join, but need general support we're all here for you.

[Big_Sissy]

Ok, thanks.

[Mamallama]

BS, I think you could be a part of the support group without revealing your exact addiction or things you want to overcome. There might be others who would like to participate but would rather not reveal their exact 'weakness' or weaknesses so to speak either.

Perhaps in such situations, the thing one wants to overcome could have a codename such as simply calling it "X" or something. As one reports, one could tell us what healthy things they've been doing in their life which helped to avoid doing "X" for 12 hours etc......this way, one is reporting on one's progress without having to reveal a very private problem.

Does that make sense, or sound too confusing?

Bottom line, in my opinion, if anyone has very private weaknesses they are trying to overcome, I don't think we all have to know that most private problem in order for the support group to work. The common ground here is that we are all working on ways to live a more healthy lifestyle.
Just what I think anyway.

[Big_Sissy]

Thanks for the ideas.

Honestly, I don't want this to be about me and I'm not sure I'm ready to do anything...

[Mamallama]

Dia, I'm so glad you're organizing this. What a great idea you've got going here. I'm so excited to get started.....well sort of......this means I have to commit to myself to do this.... but this is good for me.....When's our official start date?

And BS, no worries, didn't you get the memo, this is all about ME not you......
Seriously I'd love to have you be a part of the group if you felt up to it----you're such a great cheer leader you know

[Meticulous madness]

Oh....this is going to be awesome you guys!!!

The more the merrier, too!

And I love ACT, ML. It's perfect.

I haven't been able to get on the forum for a few days (computer issues 'ugh', or maybe it's the user ). Either way, I loved coming back and seeing a few more interested people.

FUN.

[Big_Sissy]

Originally Posted by Mamallama

And BS, no worries, didn't you get the memo, this is all about ME not you......
Seriously I'd love to have you be a part of the group if you felt up to it----you're such a great cheer leader you know

We'll see. I could always join later right

[Dia Minha]

Mama, I'm excited too. I just hope it lives up to everyone expectations. We should be up and running tomorrow. I'll send BigS a private message so he has a list of everyone joining and we should be good to go.

BigS I would love you to join. Even if it was just to be our cheerleader when we really need one. I think that because you too suffer from an addiction that you will be much more understanding. You don't have to share your addictions to share what you have learned. I'm sure there is a lot you can teach each one of us. Please feel free to just check up on us and see how things are going. When you feel safe, or when you find a safe way to join in, we would love to hear from you.