Extremely picky eater

[mxmama]

My youngest son is 3 ½, at about 1 yr old he all of a sudden became the pickiest eater ever. I am not kidding; he won’t eat meat, pasta, bread, potato’s, eggs… nothing! He lives off of cereal and milk.

I tried starving him; he just gets cranky and sick after 3-4 days so I cave.
I tried forcing him but he just really freaks out and cries until he gags.


A few times I have been able to bribe him with coke, since we don’t drink that it’s a treat for my children to get it. Anyway I try with say macaroni and cheese. I tell him for every little bite he takes; he can drink a sip of coke. And it’s the most pathetic site in the world to see a little child force themselves to eat while they are gagging. I feel horrible when this happens and when I see the food coming back up and him fighting it I reward him for trying and take the food away. He isn’t crying because he wants to eat it, he wants to drink the coke, but his body isn’t letting him. I feel so bad after that.

This is driving me nuts these are the only things he will eat if offered

Popcorn
Cookie crisp
Yogurt (only one kind)
Milk
Tostitos corn chips
Grapes
Cheesy rice cakes
Some ice creams, not many
Popsicles
Marshmallows from count chaucula cereal (I don’t give them but he would eat them if I did)

Once in a blue moon he will eat a French fry or two. We are not fast food eaters, but if we do pick something up he will try a fry and finish it, but that’s it.

He won’t even eat regular potato chips

I may have forgotten something but that about sums it all up. What the heck should I do and how long should I let this go on? He is just average for his weight. Seems healthy to me, doesn’t get sick and isn’t weak or cranky.

If I read this 3 years ago I would blame it all on the parents and say its their fault. They are allowing the child to be picky and so he is. I would have never believed you couldn’t starve a child to eat real food…

but you can’t. Trust me!

Anyone ever heard of this?

[Big_Sissy]

HOLY COW! And I thought we had some picky eaters

[mxmama]

Yes its really hard... Its aggravating as all get out too.

Sometimes that I say to my self "how can anyone NOT like...?"


toast with butter... who doesn't like a good piece of toast.

[5ft Diva]

Hey, I'm w/ you there!

Hmmm, this is perplexing. Is there a possibility he's pregnant? No, I'm just kidding. Actually, I had a couple of thoughts run through my head while reading your post. The first would be to call your pediatrician and find out what they think about your son's diet. Based on his age, I'm gonna guess you've already talked to your pediatrician about it. What did they say?

The other thought was is there a possibility that this is a control issue? Is this the only thing that your son feels he can control in his life? Kind of a weird thought but kids just don't make sense sometimes.

A question I had was, is there a common denominator in all of the foods that he is willing to eat or isn't willing to eat? What's the pattern? Anyway, those are my thoughts. Good luck, I don't know what I would do if I were in your shoes other than pprraaaaayyy! Let me know how it goes.

[Dia Minha]

Have you had him tested for food allergies? You would be surprised at how young a child can and will know what makes them sick or just not feel good.

Dia

[Imahoot]

Wow what wonderful questions to ask everyone. In my experience with Jacob who will only eat anything starchy is to keep trying and take it slow. Maybe introduce one new food every few days or so. Our Jacob is autistic so is a little bit different in why he won't eat certain things but he gags on things too. We have narrowed some things down like romaine lettuce is a no but iceberg lettuce in the school lunchroom is good. Go figure! It only took us about 3 months to figure this one out through trial and error. He literally gags on the texture of it. Some kids are more sensitive to textures. Is he more sensitive to textures than your other kids? Do tags and his socks bother him or is it just eating? Some kids have a higher sensitivity to these things. The doctor just tells me to give him a multivitamin and try to get good stuff in whenever I can. I am also curious as to what your pediatrician has said.

[smed]

Is he drinking alot of milk or juice? Somethimes this will make them to full to eat!

[PhillyGirl]

I have a fairly picky eater myself; she is under weight though. If your doctors aren't too concerned then maybe it is just a power struggle and he will grow tired of this stage. It is so hard to say not to care because for me it is on my every thought about what I am going to get her to eat and how to get her to eat more. I almost don't care what she eats as long as she eats; but now that I see your situation that doesn't sound any better. The thing that has really helped me is to go see a nutritionist at our children's hospital. She was kind of moody but she had some really good advice to offer. It was nice to have a professional tell me what was best then a bunch of conflicting advice from everyone. I found out even my pediatrician was wrong.

Here is what I got and you can see if it applies to you and your son at all. Take emotion out of food; whatever you do don't make it a power struggle. They always win. There should be no rewards or punishments for eating. Set specific meal times and don't offer food until the next meal or snack. They should eat three meals a day and two to three snacks. You can offer two things for meal times and let them choose. She suggested if I was going to introduce a new item or reintroduce a rejected item that I should offer a favorite with it. She said that I should never force. That is easier said then done; all you want to do is force the food into them. The responsibility of the parent is to provide healthy food and it is the responsibility of the child what they eat and how much they eat. This helped me because it put the responsibility back on the child. She also told me it could take up to a month of trying it this way for them to accept that this is the way things are. I offer breakfast and we sit there eating together for 20-30 or less min. and if she doesn't eat anything that I offer then she can get down and wait until snack time when I offer some more choices. I do this for all meals. There are days that she doesn't eat as much as I think she should but we just move onto the next day. I was actually surprised how well this has been working so far.

I don't know if this helps at all. In no way am I tell you what you should do; just what my experience has been. I sympathize with you one hundred percent. It is the hardest things I have dealt with as a mother so far. I wish you good luck and you and your son will be in our prayers. Also, I read a good book: "How to get your child to eat, but not to much." It was by some lady I think her name was Ellen something. Let me know if you have any questions.

[mxmama]

well basically I do the routine thing. But I always put something I know he will choose cause I want him to eat something. Pediatrician is his grandfather and hasn't thought a thing about it as long as he is healthy. He does take a multi vitamin.

I have tried every tactic u can imagine.
I have learned how to get him to try new things.
Reverse psychology!
If I put something in front of him and say, "don't you dare eat that, its mine" And when he eats it I freak out saying. "no no I wanted that, Its mine" All in a playful voice... he loves the game!
But poor baby is pushing himself to eat something he just hates. Its so pitiful! Watching him gag and try and keep him mouth closed. I need to video it.


Yes there is a connection... He will eat finger foods that are crunchy and dry.
But then the Yogurt throws that off. Yogurt is the only soft food he will eat. But one brand only all others make him gag... I have even tried putting another brand in the regular yogurt cup to fool him... he gags


he wont eat pudding, but some ice creams he will.
The ONLY thing he will eat warm or hot is popcorn.

he wont eat any cooked food. He will try, but is really sad.

All my children are fussy about tags on clothing and such...but I am too
So these children that are more sensitive than others... what do you do about it??


I am so used to this, I used to really bother me. I am kind of over it, but I wonder what about when he goes to school...I wonder if peer pressure will help or hurt him.

I am not really worried about his health physically anymore....
but now I worry about it mentally whats causing this

[mxmama]

Originally Posted by Dia Minha

Have you had him tested for food allergies? You would be surprised at how young a child can and will know what makes them sick or just not feel good.

Dia

NO I havent... that is a great idea!!!

[mxmama]

Originally Posted by Imahoot

He literally gags on the texture of it. Some kids are more sensitive to textures.

you know I believe it is a texture thing... I watch his mouth move in a way that is just not happy with the "feel" of the food.

[5ft Diva]

Oh, well, BS can relate to that. He drives me nuts the things he won't eat because it feels weird in his mouth. Makes sense to me if that's the issue w/ your son. Sounds like you're doing everything right and you seem to have a really good attitude about it.

On another note, I heard somewhere that gifted (very smart) children have sensitivities to things that most of us can tolerate. I don't know enough to know if this is how it is in your case but it's something to think about, I suppose.

[Big_Sissy]

Originally Posted by Imahoot

Wow what wonderful questions to ask everyone. In my experience with Jacob who will only eat anything starchy is to keep trying and take it slow. Maybe introduce one new food every few days or so. Our Jacob is autistic so is a little bit different in why he won't eat certain things but he gags on things too. We have narrowed some things down like romaine lettuce is a no but iceberg lettuce in the school lunchroom is good. Go figure! It only took us about 3 months to figure this one out through trial and error. He literally gags on the texture of it. Some kids are more sensitive to textures. Is he more sensitive to textures than your other kids? Do tags and his socks bother him or is it just eating? Some kids have a higher sensitivity to these things. The doctor just tells me to give him a multivitamin and try to get good stuff in whenever I can. I am also curious as to what your pediatrician has said.

Oh my gosh Ima -- I am such a texture eater it's not funny -- and YES, my socks have to be exactly right, and tags do bother me if they are showing -- though, I don't have to have them removed.

[Big_Sissy]

Originally Posted by 5ft Diva

Oh, well, BS can relate to that. He drives me nuts the things he won't eat because it feels weird in his mouth. Makes sense to me if that's the issue w/ your son. Sounds like you're doing everything right and you seem to have a really good attitude about it.

On another note, I heard somewhere that gifted (very smart) children have sensitivities to things that most of us can tolerate. I don't know enough to know if this is how it is in your case but it's something to think about, I suppose.

You just wouldn't understand unless you felt it. Some textures really do make me want to gag. So I understand where these little guys are coming from -- although I didn't make the connection until now.

[mxmama]

Originally Posted by 5ft Diva

On another note, I heard somewhere that gifted (very smart) children have sensitivities to things that most of us can tolerate. I don't know enough to know if this is how it is in your case but it's something to think about, I suppose.

Yes, you are probably right! And he gets it all from me

(as long as its good)

[mxmama]

Originally Posted by Big_Sissy

Oh my gosh Ima -- I am such a texture eater it's not funny -- and YES, my socks have to be exactly right, and tags do bother me if they are showing -- though, I don't have to have them removed.

Ok the sock thing.... who in the heck can walk around with their sock all twisted wrong or inside out? I mean just thinking of that DRIVES ME NUTS

Originally Posted by Big_Sissy

You just wouldn't understand unless you felt it. Some textures really do make me want to gag. So I understand where these little guys are coming from -- although I didn't make the connection until now.

Ok answer this.... SISSY

Is there anything that has a texture you cant stand but has a flavor you like?


Is that possible... I never think texture... only flavor. Then texture can play a factor, but flavor over rides everything

[Big_Sissy]

Nope mama, texture over all. I might like the taste, but if the texture in any way shape or form offends the palate, it's over.

Agree on the socks. My boys DRIVE ME NUTS - they did not get the sock thing from me, as they could care less.

[mxmama]

I got to know.....can you name something you like the taste of, but cant get over the texture.


Hey your probably gifted

[Big_Sissy]

Oh, I'm gifted alright

strawberries. I like them off the vine, but stick them in Yogurt or or anything that would make them slimey, and BOOM it's over.

[mxmama]

do you eat yogurt of a different flavor? And like it?

I know these seem meaningless to you, but its really interesting to me