Playing With Your Kids

[runamyrun]

This is my attempt at Diaminha's challenge to start a new thread. A lot of times I feel like I do a crummy job playing with my kids each day. I feel like I have to remind myself that I am not staying home to clean my house all day, that I am here for my kids. I realize I do a way better job of actually sitting down and playing with my kids when I do not have a baby, but I can still do better now. I know that I need to limit the amount of time I am online. I also know that if I had more of a schedule, then I would be better about planning activities. If I did both of those things, I know I could do a lot better. Oh, and I just realized that I spend a bunch of time being a taxi driver with a 2nd grader and a kindergartener (I realize all of you are just as busy if not a lot more!). So next year should be a little easier that way. I am sorry that I am rambling all over the place.

What do you do to play with your kids and be with them? I guess I do spend a lot of time cuddling with my baby. I also spend a bunch of time being silly with my kids. So I am doing things with them, but it is not an organized game. Does anyone else feel the way I do?

[Dia Minha]

I know that my girl's would be better off if I had them on a schedule, but I just tend to follow their lead. If my four year old wants to play a game, I play. If my two year old wants to read a book, we read a book. For me it's not the housekeeping. I'm fine letting that go, but sometimes my brain feels like it is on overload. My four year old talks non-stop and I just need time to myself. That is when I get on the computer. However, if one of my girls comes to me and wants me to play, read, or cuddle with them I will do it. I find that we are all a lot happier.

Somethings we do is play Sorry, Skipbo, we have a reading time every day, my four year old likes to work on her letters and numbers and we have card games and puzzle games we use to do so. We also dance. We put on music and the girls put on dress up clothes and we dance around the living room. My four year old also likes projects. I keep an assortment of pom-pom balls, pipe cleaners, colored paper, scissors glue, markers, glitter, etc. and we will just sit down and create. We also play some games on the computer. My four year old loves Yatzee. She cheats if playing with dice, but she can't on the computer. There are also several websites, like Strawberry Shortcake that have matching games and such. Usually I just watch them and cheer for them when they win.

I'm not sure if that is what you are looking for.

[5ft Diva]

This is a great topic, RAR. I have to admit I laughed when I tried to envision what being silly w/ your kids looked like. I mean, if it's anything like what my kids look like when they're silly - you're having yourself a really good time!

I find that my kids and I take turns calling the shots when it comes to 'playtime'. Sometimes they have really good ideas (that I have enough energy for) and other times they like my ideas. I notice that I tend to play when I'm trying to avoid working so I'll have to work on that.

The activity/playtime depends on my mood at the moment. After reflecting on this thought a little bit I find that my playtimes come in spurts. It's not like we have a scheduled play time every day (which I know some mom's do - and I think that's great). I notice that I just take it when it comes. Like when we're at the store. Sometimes it's fun to pretend like the shopping cart is a race car. This definitely falls under the definition of "playing with your kids". I have on occasion joined in a game that my kids have started while doing chores. For instance, emptying the dishwasher. I have a son that pretends he's being attacked by some sort of "bad guy" every time he's putting away each item from the dishwasher. I can only handle playing this for a little bit as there are a lot of items in the dishwasher, but even a little bit, I have found, goes a long way. He also does this w/ putting away toys and stuff like that. And like I said - only on occasion do I do that. And even though a lot of play times are moment to moment I do enjoy when we plan our play times, for instance, at the pool. The kids sure have a lot of fun looking forward to those days. It seems to help getting from one day to the next a little smoother.

It's so easy to complain about one's kids so I really enjoy the opportunities when I get to talk about the fun and positive aspect of being a mother. Thanks again, RAR, for bringing this topic up.

[Meticulous madness]

I agree this is a great topic.

I, too, would like some sort of structure in the near future (just because I NEED structure). But, I'm content for now to let my kids take the lead, as Dia says. If you're just open to the playing part and being silly, when they need it - I think everybody benefits.

I was never able to be home with my kids until last June. Financial circumstances just didn't allow it. I longed for it. I promised myself a few things, if I was ever blessed with the opportunity. I swore I would never take it for granted. And I have been having a blast.

I do; however, feel like it's time to establish a few more routines in order to accomplish more (in every aspect of my life). I'm interested in what other moms do. I love ideas.

And for the record, RAR, some of my best (and most vivid) memories with my own mom entailed much silliness. I don't remember a lot of play time, to be honest (in all fairness, I was never good at imagination anyway). But, I always felt loved, safe, listened to, well-taken care of and I have a wonderful relationship with my family. I attribute a lot of that to a large daily dose of silliness and laughter.

[natickgirl]

I struggle with taking time to play with my kids. I love to have fun, and I always thought I'd be the playful neighborhood mom that all the kids wanted to be around. But I find that the times my children want to be silly & goof around are the exact time that I DO NOT...usually when I'm making dinner or involved in something else. I'm not very good at playing with my kids & letting everything else go. I'm also not very imaginative, so I have a hard time coming up with exciting things to do. When my daughter want to do crafts (which is pretty much every day), I groan because I know it just means a big mess to clean up. I need to learn how to relax and just let her have fun. I'm better at playing Legos or a game with my son, but I can't stand playing dolls with my youngest (see statement about lack of imagination). Pathetic, I know. Poor kids.

[PhillyGirl]

I agree with NG. I want to play with my daughter and be a fun mom; but I find that she wants me to play at the exact time I am busy. I know I need to just get down and play with her more and on her terms. I find it hard to always be the friend that she wants me to be.

[5ft Diva]

It's so easy to beat ourselves up when we're not who we imagined we'd be. Some of you may not have unstructured play time (or what you perceive to be unstructured play time) w/ your kids, but who says unstructured play time is better than structured play time? I personally feel that they both have their place in this life and whichever way you choose to play w/ your kids is simply a matter of preference. I think as long as you're taking the time to think outside the everyday mundane "box" you're "playing" with your kids.

Keep the suggestions coming, ladies; I've been more cognizant of quality playtime w/ my kids since reading the info on here. You all are awesome!

[PhillyGirl]

I think for me I am going to make some sort of schedule so I get in the things I want to get in. Like reading time and art time etc. I think if I don't have a have a plan then I let the day slip by and have no idea what I have accomplished. But I think that is just what works for me.

[5ft Diva]

That's a great way to multi-task, PG! I've got a question for you, but I'll start it in another thread.