Your children's parents

[Erudite]

I'm reading a book called The Gift of Self by Marion D. Hanks. I came across this story and I thought I would share it, because it's so interesting to think about. I was planning on posting this earlier, so I don't want anyone to think I posted it merely because of the discussions we've had about loss. It is something for us all to consider no matter what our circumstances.

A young man who had lost his father in his earliest years went to an elderly medical man who had been a close friend of his father and asked the doctor what kind of man his father had been. The old doctor answered the question with a question: "Suppose you could have chosen your father--that is, what kind of man he would be--what would your choice have been?"

The young man replied that he would have chosen one who was courageous and forthright and true; a kind, wise, and loving man; a worshipper, worker, and servant of God. He described clearly and forcefully an ideal father, then asked, "Doctor, is that the sort of man my father was?"

Said the doctor, "As your father's friend, let me ask you another question. Is that the sort of man you have chosen to be the father of your own children?" The young man said, "With all my thinking about life and its responsibilities, I confess that I have not thought about this important matter in just that way before. Though I had nothing to do with choosing my own father, I have everything to do with choosing what kind of father my own children shall have. I give you my word that I shall think bout and act upon it from now on."

...

Though we could not choose or direct in our earliest days the home we grow up in or the parents who bore us, we can do something about the sort of parents we are or will be, and about the home our children will grow up in.

[bookworm]

Excellent quote- very good story and definitely something to take into cosideration!! Thanks, E!

[Meticulous madness]

Oooh. I like this. Thanks for sharing ER. Good things to think about.

[Dia Minha]

Wow, I really like this. Thanks E.

One think I am thankful for, is my mom's ability to see and be able to admit that she was/is not a perfect mother. We often talk about how certain traits, good and bad, are passed down from generation, such has hoarding and procrastination. Some of it is inherited, but most is environmental. We can use that as an excuse and do it just like "mom". Or we can make the decision to be better. If I can do just a little bit better than she did and my kids a little bit better than me, then the future generations will be blessed.

[Erudite]

Interesting. I just got off the phone with my sister and we were talking about how our parents didn't really know how to have fun, so we don't either. I'm about to start a new thread on that, but thought it was interesting to consider in this thread too.